Just another Day

I want to run away

Inside my bright red scream

I want to break the door

Holding back my dream

Living like this

Checking the skies for rain

A constant reminder

Of this burden and pain

I'm holding on to

A shooting star

Its points cutting my skin

This time it's gone too far

Nothing left to wish on

My bloody star fell

Left me drowning in hopes

Inside my wishing well

Not looking for a hero

To owe such a debt

I would not ask for saving
This loss is not a regret

I want to run away
But there's nothing out there

I want to shatter windows

That look out on nowhere

This is not life

If I'm already dead

My bleeding heart stopped beating

And tears I no longer shed.

Yesterday I woke up feeling almost normal. I was feeling strong and confident. It lasted most of the day. Then it all came to a crashing halt. Today was not a good day, but yesterday is brought me hope that maybe tomorrow will be better.

The last couple months have been a bit of a roller coaster ride. There has been many ups and downs, not to mentions the twists and turns all at such a rapid pace. I am still holding on, and I am not letting go. I have learned a lot as well. Never judge a book by it's cover, people aren't always what you hear. Everyone is special in their own way. There is always two sides to every story. I just wish other people could see that too.

My weight is still dropping, slowing but none the less still dropping. I have reached my original goal and now are five or so pounds below that. I have went from a size 22 to a size 7. I need to work on building more muscles and getting my strength up. My back is hurt because to I don't have the core muscles to support me. I am sure with time this will work it's self out.

Size 22 and Now Size 7